Killing US Softly With His WOK

Willie Bobo - Fried Neckbones and Some Homefries
Goodie Mob - Soul Food
Kenny Burrell - Chitlins Con Carne
Horace Andy - Eating Mess
World Famous Upsetters - Cabbage Greens
L. Anderson - Neck Bones and Hot Sauce
Them Prodigals - Cake Time

We all know Chinese take-out isn't good for you. But did you know it was THAT BAD for you? The Center for Science in the Public Interest recently released a study of the nutritional contents of the typical chinese take-out cuisine. Healthy options? Not so much.

Here's what a CSPI nutritionist had to say: “My basic advice to diners is this: Stick with the veggie-rich and stir-fried shrimp or chicken dishes, steer clear of the entrées that are basically deep-fried meat or chicken in sauce, and don’t waste your calories on greasy noodles and fried rice.”

I'm sure your kids are salivating. Who goes to the Chinese take-out for vegetables?

The chicken wings and fried rice combo is that ish when you're searching for a lunch special and your moms only gave you 3 dollars. They'll cut your wings for you. They'll squirt hot sauce and barbeque sauce on your wings. All that for $2.75. God bless America. As a bonus, you'll get enough salt for two days. If you grab a couple Yi-Pin soy sauces, you'll get four days worth of salt. In my book, that's an effin' BARGAIN.

YOU do the math.

You have a QUARTER leftover for dessert. You'll need to find the nearest bodega. Don't fret, you've got CHOICES. You can go for the nickel Swedish fish (five of 'em). Or, you can get one QUARTER water (yes, it's a dessert). Or, you can get one Lil Debbie oatmeal cream pie. If you skip school on Monday and Friday, you can have a different dessert for every school lunch!

It doesn't end there. The Chinese take-out offers even more bargains for your kids. You can always go for the $1.25 large fries. If they squirt enough FREE ketchup on it, you got your vegetables too. Free ketchup and $1.75 in your pockets. Life is good.

This is America, we have the freedom to make our own choices. With your extra change do you go for the 50 cent honey-bun or splurge on the 2-cookies-for-99-cents?