Pimpin' All Over the Latin World

The Honey Drippers - Impeach The President
Billy Baron - Communications Is Where It's At
Bushwick Bill - Mr. President

G DUBBZ has spent the last week spreading the gospel of democracy in the Latin Americas. In the words of DUBBZ, "I want to talk about another important priority for our country, and that is helping our neighbors to the south of us build a better and productive life."

Translation: We desperately NEED the Hispanic vote.

Peep this DUBBZ classic: "Yet, despite the advances, tens of millions in our hemisphere remain stuck in poverty, and shut off from the promises of the new century. My message to those trabajadores y campesinos is, you have a friend in the United States of America. We care about your plight."

Riiiiiiiiiiight. Translation: I wasn't kidding. We really need votes from you people.

During the past week, G DUBBZ spent time in Brazil, Uruguay, Columbia, Guatemala, and Mexico. Let's check in on G DUBBZ's kick-the-truth-to-the-young-Latin-youth tour.

Did the people of Brazil welcome the spreader of democracy, freedom, and rising GDPs? Not so much.

Did the folks of Uruguay relate to G DUBBZ we-doubled-our-aid-to-you-people rhetoric? Not so much.

Did the Columbians believe G DUBBZ's "our nation has a vital interest in helping the young democracies in our neighborhood succeed" schtick? Not so much.

What about Guatemala and Mexico. Surely, G DUBBZ found some love there. "If people can come into our country, for example, on a temporary basis to work, doing jobs Americans aren't doing, they won't have to sneak across the border." Surely, the you-can-come-here-as-long-as-you-do-the-nig***-jobs argument worked? Not so much.

G DUBBZ come home! We got nothin' but love for ya here.

Just make sure you stay far, far away from the Walter Reed Army Medical Center.

You should also try to avoid New Orleans, Mississippi, Alabama, and Texas. You know, all the states that were hit by Hurricane FEMA. More than the weather, it's the aftermath that STILL HURTS.

You should probably also watch your back. Even your BOYS may decide to carry weed for someone else.

Eff it, G DUBBZ. There's always the cocaina.